Darynda Jones is the American author of the Charley Davidson series of paranormal romantic thrillers and a young adult series called The Darklight Trilogy. She lives in New Mexico.
I sat with my two best friends, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that only two of us would make it out of there alive. Though I did tend to exaggerate.
But, you're his son," I said, trying really hard to hate him. "You're the son of Satan. Literally. " "And you are the stepdaughter of Denise Davidson. " Wow. That was a bit harsh, but, "Okay, point taken.
Drink coffee! Do stupid things faster and with more energy!
I'd have a longer attention span if there weren't so many shiny things.
Chocolate and coffee ? Together ? Whoever came up with that combination should have won a Nobel Peace Prize. Or at least a subscription to Reader's Digest.
It would be a miracle to solve this case. Luckily, I believed in miracles. No, wait, that was testicles. I believed in testicles.
We're like the Three Musketeers, searching for truth and justice and the American way. : Glitch snorted. "More like the Three Blind Mice, stumbling around trying to find a hunk of cheese in the dark.
But we'd never really seen eye to eye. Mostly 'cause he was much taller than I was.
I climbed into Misery and called Uncle Bob. “We hooking up?” “Why does everything out of your mouth make me sound incestuous?” “Um, I wasn’t aware that it did. Perhaps you have a guilty conscience. ” “Charley. ” “Is there something you need to get off your chest? Besides that skank I saw you with the other day?
If it weren’t for physics and law enforcement, I’d be unstoppable.
This place is like crazy on crackers.
You introduced me to Danger and Will Robinson, but you neglected to acquaint me with the other two. ” “Fine,But you can’t make fun of their names. They’re very sensitive. ” “I would never. ” I pointed in the general vicinity of my left ovary, “This is Beam Me Up. ” Then to my right. “And this is Scotty.
My real mom died when I was born—hemorrhaged to death while giving birth to me, which has never been one of my favorite memories—and Dad married Denise before I’d turned a year. Without even asking my opinion on the matter. Denise and I never really clicked.
I’m Charlotte Davidson: private investigator, police consultant, all -around badass. Or I could’ve been a badass, had I stuck with those lessons in mixed martial arts. I was only in that class to learn how to kill people with paper.
What in the name of Zeus's testicles?
We really should get some X-rays,” the EMT said. “You just want to fondle my extraneous body parts,” I said to the EMT.
Death comes to those who wait. And to those who don't. So either way.
You called me at four thirty-four. . . . I hate four thirty-four. I think four thirty-four should be banned and replaced with something more reasonable, like, say, nine twelve.
That's my entire weekend. I had plans" "A Vampire Dairies marathon is not plans. " She looked at me like I lost my mind. "Have you even seen the Salvatore brothers? Holy mother of gingersnaps.
What do you want?" "You," he said, his voice lowering an octave. "I want you, Dutch, body and soul. I want you in my bed every night. I want you there when I wake up in the morning. I want your clothes strung across my apartment and your scent on my skin.