Top Johnny Carson Quotes - Quotesmemo.com

Johnny Carson Biography

John William Carson (October 23, 1925 – January 23, 2005) was an American television host, comedian, writer, and producer. He is best known as the host of The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson (1962–1992). Carson received six Emmy Awards, the Television Academy's 1980 Governor's Award, and a 1985 Peabody Award. He was inducted into the Television Academy Hall of Fame in 1987. Carson was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1992 and received a Kennedy Center Honor in 1993.

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Johnny Carson Quotes

Adults ask questions as a child does. When you stop wondering, you might as well put your rocker on the front porch and call it a day.

Adults, Call, Children, Doe, Questions, Stop

New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved.

Funny, New York, Time, Town, Unsolved

I work because I enjoy what I'm doing, and the fact that I make money at it - big money - is a fine-and-dandy side fact.

Big, Fact, Facts, Making Money, Side, Sides

We resort, frankly, to pies, which is a comedy staple that's gone back, I guess, to since the first pie was ever baked.

Baked, Firsts, Gone, Pie, Resort

The best way to thaw a frozen turkey? Blow in it's ear.

Blow, Ear, Frozen, Turkeys, Way

For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off.

Days, Death, Fingernails, Funny, Phone, Phones

We have two kinds of air: regular and chunky style.

Air, Chunky, Kinds, Regular, Style, Two

Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.

Birthday, Happiness, Paternity, Served, Suit, Suits

I am one of the lucky people in the world; I found something I always wanted to do, and I have enjoyed every single minute of it.

Lucky, Minute, People, World

Audiences have proved time and again that they don't want a steady diet of any entertainer airing his social views - especially if he's a comedian.

Airing, Comedian, Diet, Proved, Views, Want

Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand in the drill.

Being Happy, Catch, Funny, Happiness, Having

When turkeys mate they think of swans.

Drinking, Inspiration, Swans, Think, Thinking, Turkeys

George Burns has been on my show twenty or thirty times, or maybe more. How can you turn down a guy that age?

Age, Burns, Guy, Twenties

There are very few Japanese Jews. As a result, there is no Japanese word for Alan King.

Japanese, Jew, King, Kings, Results, Word

In 1932, lame duck president Herbert Hoover was so desperate to remain in the White House that he dressed up as Eleanor Roosevelt. When FDR discovered the hoax in 1936, the two men decided to stay together for the sake of the children.

Children, Hoover, House, Men, Roosevelt, White

Everybody I meet in public seems to want to audition for me. If I ask a guy what time it is, he'll sing it to me.

Auditions, Everybody, Guy, Public, Sing, Want

I can't say I ever wanted to become an entertainer. I already was one, sort of-around the house, at school, doing my magic tricks, throwing my voice and doing Popeye impersonations. People thought I was funny; so I kind of took entertaining for granted It was inevitable that I'd start giving little performances.

Funny, People, School, Voice

We're more effective than birth control pills.

Birth, Birth Control, Comedy, Effective, Pills

Happiness is sitting down to watch some slides of your neighbor's vacation and finding out that he spent two weeks in a nudist colony.

Funny, Happiness, Spent, Vacation, Watch

They say atomic rad-i-ation can hurt your reproductive organs. My answer is, so can a hockey stick. But we don't stop building them.

Answer, Atomic, Hockey, Hurt, Rad

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