Phillip Lopate (born 1943) is an American film critic, essayist, fiction writer, poet, and teacher. He is the younger brother of former radio host Leonard Lopate.
The essay is a wonderful medium. I might mention that some writers who longed to be novelists were better as essayists: Sontag, Baldwin, Vidal, Mary McCarthy, Mailer.
The trick is to realize that one is not important, except insofar as one’s example can serve to elucidate a more widespread human trait and make readers feel a little less lonely and freakish.
Domesticity has been a challenge for me but painful as it's been, engaging with family has been a school for reducing solipsism and increasing my understanding of people's different reactions to stress.
I'm fortunate in being able to find great satisfaction in my work.
I like the freedom that comes with lowered expectations.
A personal essay often includes some or a lot of personal confession. That makes the reader feel less lonely in their confusion and darkness.
You must read a lot of personal essays - you needn't reinvent the wheel.
Most good essays are conversations with yourself - not just your decided thoughts but your dilemmas.
Have fun writing, because it enhances both the writer's and reader's experience.
I've had an enduring appreciation of psychology.
Indeed, at times it's best to shut up.
The dinner party is a suburban form of entertainment. Its spread in our big cities represents an insidious Fifth Column suburbanization of the metropolis.
The knowledge that my discriminations are skewed and not always universally desirable doesn't stop me in the least from making them.
If someone in my family is getting emotionally bent out of shape, I've had to learn to adapt.
The prospect of a long day at the beach makes me panic. There is no harder work I can think of than taking myself off to somewhere pleasant, where I am forced to stay for hours and 'have fun'.
. . . I vowed that I would always respect the right of an individual to kill himself. Whether suicide was a moral or immoral act I no longer felt sure, but of the dignity of its intransigence I was convinced.
Doubt is my boon companion, the faithful St. Bernard ever at my side. Whether writing essays or just going about daily life, I am constantly second-guessing myself. My mind is filled with 'yes, buts,' 'so whats?' and other skeptical rejoinders. I am forever monitoring myself for traces of folly, insensitivity, arrogance, false humility, cruelty, stupidity, immaturity and, guess what, I keep finding examples. Age has not made me wiser, except maybe in retrospect.
I am apt to be harsh in my secret judgments of others, seeing them as defective because they are not enough like me.
For most of my life, I have wanted broad impact but now, at 72, I'm not so sure that's always my first priority.
The essay must be artistically rendered: You must keep the reader engaged, whether with wit, conflict, mischief, andor yes, with honesty.