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[Pope Francis] comes to that conviction [of family crisis] as a pastor, not as Brad Wilcox or Charles Murray. So he wants to challenge the Church to find pastoral responses to that crisis that meet real human needs.

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Woody Allen

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

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Eighty percent of success is showing up.

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Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against him.

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Until you've been kissed on a rainy Parisian afternoon - you've never been kissed.

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Bisexuality doubles your chances of a date on a Saturday night. I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic. If there is reincarnation, I'd like to come back as Warren Beatty's fingertips. I'm such a good lover because I practice a lot on my own. My love life is terrible. The last time I was inside a woman was when I visited the Statue of Liberty. Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's a pretty good one.

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Error, no keyboard. Press F1 to continue.

Continue, Errors, Funny, Keyboard, Life, Press
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