The passing minute is every man's equal possession but what has once gone by is not ours.
I am not a cat man, but a dog man, and all felines can tell this at a glance - a sharp, vindictive glance.
Two is company, four is a party, three is a crowd. One is a wanderer.
We are a nation that has always gone in for the loud laugh, the wow, the yak, the belly laugh, and the dozen other labels for the roll- em-in-the-aisles gagerissimo. This is the kind of laugh that delights actors, directors, and producers, but dismays writers of comedy because it is the laugh that often dies in the lobby. The appreciative smile, the chuckle, the soundless mirth, so important to the success of comedy, cannot be understood unless one sits among the audience and feels the warmth created by the quality of laughter that the audience takes home with it.
If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
Let me be the first to admit that the naked truth about me is to the naked truth about Salvador Dali as an old ukulele in the attic is to a piano in a tree, and I mean a piano with breasts. Senor Dali has the jump on me from the beginning. He remembers and describes in detail what it was like in the womb. My own earliest memory is of accompanying my father to a polling booth in Columbus, Ohio, where he voted for William McKinley.
One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.
To me the most important thing is getting into a studio and making an album that is 12 or 14 amazing songs, getting up onstage, and making people happy by livening the rock.
Oh my God, so many young girls now look like whores!
Chicken is good and never stop eating you will look like me and you will have hair like me and sing like me and be 500 pounds!!!!
The good fighters of old first put themselves beyond the possibility of defeat, and then waited for an opportunity of defeating the enemy.