I've tested life and I've learned what works for me.
Class Day is a terrible name for a day when you don't have to go to any class.
I like things that are immature and offbeat and bizarre. Random jokes. Weird stuff. And stupid. Stupid is the highest compliment a person can pay to me.
If had a penny for every strange look I've gotten from strangers on the street I'd have about 10 to 15 dollars, which is a lot when you're dealing with pennies.
It’s crazy. Since there have been men and women, there have been funny women. . . f**king idiot-ass men keep saying that women aren't funny. It makes me crazy. I find it disgusting and offensive every time.
It's just cool to be involved in something that's that big and joyous and meant to make people feel happy.
I do a lot of laughing at my own self in life, so I think I come at things with a pretty easygoing view.
Once established, an original river advances through its long life, manifesting certain peculiarities of youth, maturity and old age, by which its successive stages of growth may be recognized without much difficulty.
The sensation of falling was the worst part.
Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon. I am the first man to piss his pants on the moon.
I just can't sit still and meditate; that doesn't kind of work for me. I don't even know exactly what it means.