After most deaths, I imagine, the awfulness lies in how everything’s changed…. there’s a hole. It’s person-shaped and it follows you everywhere…. For us what was killing was how nothing had changed. We’d been waiting to be transformed, and now here we were, back in our old life.
. . . it was as if there were always some good fortune with me that would keep me from going hungry. I knew I would never die of hunger.