Grief does not seem to me to be a choice. Whether or not you think grief has value, … - Mark Doty

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Do you think it is a vain hope that one day man will find joy in noble deeds of light and mercy, rather than in the coarse pleasures he indulges in today -- gluttony, fornication, ostentation, boasting, and envious vying with his neighbor? I am certain this is not a vain hope and that the day will come soon.

Mark Doty

Grief does not seem to me to be a choice. Whether or not you think grief has value, you will lose what matters to you. The world will break your heart. So I think we’d better look at what grief might offer us. It’s like what Rilke says about self-doubt: it is not going to go away, and therefore you need to think about how it might become your ally.

Grief, Heart, Says, Think, Thinking, World

Same Author Quotes

Being in grief, it turns out, is not unlike being in love. In both states, the imagination's entirely occupied with one person. The beloved dwells at the heart of the world, and becomes a Rome: the roads of feeling all lead to him, all proceed from him. Everything that touches us seems to relate back to that center: there is no other emotional life, no place outside the universe of feeling centered on its pivotal figure.

Grief, Heart, Being In Love, Person, Roads, Figure

Even sad stories are company. And perhaps that's why you might read such a chronicle, to look into a companionable darkness that isn't yours.

Chronicle, Companionable, Darkness, Looks, Read, Stories

Love, I think, is a gateway to the world, not an escape from it.

Gateway, Gateways, Think, Thinking, World

We long to connect; we fear that if we do, our freedom and individuality will disappear.

Disappear, Individuality, Long

Here and gone. That’s what it is to be human, I think—to be both someone and no one at once, to hold a particular identity in the world (our names, our place of origins, our family and affectional ties) and to feel that solid set of ties also capable of dissolution, slipping away, as we become moments of attention.

Identity, Names, Particular, Thinking, Ties