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This is what happens when you go against the grain of truth. You get splinters later on.

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Hari Kondabolu

I've always looked older.

Looked, Older
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Telling me that I’m obsessed with talking about racism in America is like telling me I’m obsessed with swimming when I’m drowning.

Swimming, Talking, America, Telling, Drowning

I have had vegan Thanksgiving of tofurkey and soy gravy. And it's not to say that Thanksgiving will ever justify the genocide of the Native Americans. But vegan Thanksgiving - that's just spitting on the graves, isn't it?

Funny Thanksgiving, Justify, Native American, Say, Soy, Thanksgiving

People always talk about the content, in terms of the politics of it or whatever social issues are in it, and it's like, "Yeah, but I'm also a good comic. " You could at least talk about the form of it, and I feel like that's always the thing that's missed.

Comic, Issues, Missed, People

Just give us 50 years where we're the only ones who are allowed to profit from art, and then you can do whoever you want. In fact, I'll buy you the paint. Whatever you want. Just give us 50 years. 50 years. That's it.

Art, Buy, Giving, Paint, Profit

I don't tie my shoes right. I tie them the way you would tie a gift, like a bow.

Like, Shoes, Tie, Ties, Way
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