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I would never join the Tea Partiers, because I don't have a problem with the color of Obama's skin. I don't have a problem with immigrants. You know what I mean? I do have genuine problems with policy and government corruption. Sure I do. And I speak very candidly about that, regardless of who's in office. But since the Tea Partiers are ridiculous, why would I urge anyone to participate with them?

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Lewis Grizzard

There's no such thing as being too Southern.

Guidance, Southern, Thing, Too Busy
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I know lots of people who are educated far beyond their intelligence.

Educated, Intelligence, Know, Knows, Lots, People

In the south there's a difference between 'Naked' and 'Nekkid. ' 'Naked' means you don't have any clothes on. 'Nekkid' means you don't have any clothes on and you're up to somethin'.

Clothes, Difference, Differences, Mean, Nekkid, Somethin

The only way that I could figure they could improve upon Coca-Cola, one of life's most delightful elixirs, which studies prove will heal the sick and occasionally raise the dead, is to put bourbon in it.

Dead, Drinking, Prove, Raise, Sick, Way

It's difficult to think anything but pleasant thoughts while eating a homegrown tomato.

Food, Garden, Pleasant, Summer, Think, Tomato

"Have you done your homework?" my mother would ask. "I'll do it later. " "You will do it now, young man. I don't want you winding up on the third shift at Flagg-Utica. " Flagg-Utica was a local textile plant. Somehow, I never could figure how failing to read three chapters in my geography book about the various sorts of vegetation to be found in a tropical rain forest had anything to do with facing a life as a mill hand. But with enough guilt and fear as catalysts, you can read anything, even geography books and Deuteronomy.

Book, Fear, Geography, Guilt, Mother, Read
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