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I open with a clock striking, to beget an awful attention in the audience - it also marks the time, which is four o clock in the morning, and saves a description of the rising sun, and a great deal about gilding the eastern hemisphere.

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Molly Ivins

I think of Texas as the laboratory for bad government.

Thinking, Government, Texas, Laboratory, Think
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There are two kinds of humor. One kind that makes us chuckle about our foibles and our shared humanity -- like what Garrison Keillor does. The other kind holds people up to public contempt and ridicule -- that's what I do. Satire is traditionally the weapon of the powerless against the powerful. I only aim at the powerful. When satire is aimed at the powerless, it is not only cruel -- it's vulgar.

Chuckle, Contempt, Garrison, People, Powerful, Two

Most of us think of government as them. Yet government isn't Them: It's us.

Thinking, Government, Think

Satire is traditionally the weapon of the powerless against the powerful.

Powerful, Weapons, Satire, Against, Traditionally

The thing about democracy, beloveds, is that it is not neat, orderly, or quiet. It requires a certain relish for confusion.

Confusion, Democracy, Beloved, Beloveds, Quiet, Thing

Some days, I'd feel better with Punxsutawney Phil in the Oval Office - at least he doesn't lie about the weather.

Days, Feel Better, Lying, Phil, Weather
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