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We have the agency to choose which characteristics will define us; those choices are not thrust upon us.

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Michael Showalter

The only Train song I like is the one that I play in my act "Drops Of Jupiter". Sheryl Crow has three or four songs that I like; also Dave Matthews Band. With those particular musicians, it's more that there are a few songs that I like rather than their entire body of work. There are a lot of indie bands that I like too. I'm not a snob about music. Does the fact that I like Stephen Sondheim and Broadway musicals make me a fake? Does the fact that I'm "the Billy Joel of comedy" mean that I don't have indie-rock credibility?

Bands, Fake, Jupiter, Mean, Song, Songs
Same Author Quotes

Maybe in 10 years,I'll only be doing "classical" comedy. Or crashing my car into trees.

Car, Classical, Comedy, Maybe, Tree

I like doing all different types of comedy - stand-up, sketch, movies, TV. I like to try everything.

Comedy, Different, Like, Trying, Types

Cats are unpredictable because they're wild and domestic at the same time. Watching a cat's behavior is like a small window into the wild.

Behavior, Cat, Time, Unpredictable, Window

I feel like marriage is a sacred institution that should only be between a man and a woman. If a gay couple wants to be married, why can't they just be satisfied with a civil union? Why do they have to get "married"?

Couple, Gay, Like, Marriage, Men

I'm not big on fat jokes. That's a little beneath me. I'm not a huge fan of making a joke completely at someone else's expense. Even though I think he does it better than anyone else, I don't love. . . Well, it's different with Sacha Baron Cohen, but that whole thing where you're "punking" people? I don't like that. I don't like doing it, and I don't particularly find it funny when the joke is on a person who doesn't know they're being set up.

Different, Making, Particularly, People, Sacha, Thinking
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