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When you sing in English and Spanish, it's two completely different forms of expression and. . . even the people who don't speak Spanish love to hear me sing in Spanish.

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Jenny Lawson

It's true, I did say I wanted girlfriends," I capitulated hesitantly, "but couldn't we start with something smaller and less terrifying? Like maybe spend a weekend at a crack house? I heard those people are very nonjudgmental, and if you accidentally say something offensive you can just blame it on their hallucinations.

Girlfriend, House, People, Smaller, Weekend
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Every time I get scared or feel like I'm not going to be good enough at something, I say that mantra to myself. "Pretend you're good at it. "

Be Good, Good, Good Enough, Pretend, Scared, Time

Because you are defined not by life's imperfect moments, but by your reaction to them. And because there is joy in embracing - rather than running from - the utter absurdity of life.

Absurdity Of Life, Imperfect, Joy, Running, Utter

One moment I'm perfectly fine and the next I feel a wave of nausea, then panic. Then I can't catch my breath and I know I'm about to lose control and all I want to do is escape. Except that the one thing I can't escape from is the very thing I want to run away from. . . me.

Know, Nausea, Panic, Running, Want, Wave

When I was young, my family didn't go on outings to the circus or trips to Disneyland. We couldn't afford them. Instead, we stayed in our small rural West Texas town, and my parents took us to cemeteries.

Circus, Disneyland, Goes On, Parent, Small, Texas

The first thing I do when I come home is check the refrigerator for cats because I'm convinced that if one dies, my husband will hide it in there because I don't cook and so I won't see it. I do drink Cokes, though ,so technically he should hide the corpse in the oven. And now I need to start checking the oven.

Cat, Cats, Home, Husband, Refrigerator, Start
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