Top Brad Stine Quotes - Quotesmemo.com

Brad Stine Biography

Brad Stine (born 1960) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, and author. Relatively unknown until 2003, Stine first gained exposure when he was identified as a conservative Christian on his debut album, Put a Helmet On!

Read about Brad Stine in Wikipedia

Random Authors

Brad Stine Quotes

Comedy, if it's done well, can reflect the mood of a nation. It can be a mirror to who we are, what we believe in, what we are like.

Believe, Done, Like, Mirrors

You want to reclaim your country? You got to go back to the first men who started this country, the founding fathers and this is going to be shocking for the liberal professors out there that are indoctrinating our kids but the founding fathers believed in the Judeo-Christian god that believed we have life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness! You can pursuit it. If you don't get it, it's your fault! You messed up. Go back to work. Work harder.

Christian, Country, Fathers, Happiness, Men, Shocking

The way to stop political correctness is to not do it. If someone says, You offended me then you say I don't care! If they're offended by the truth, that's their issue!

Care, Issues, Offended, Political, Says

We should have a way of telling people they have bad breath without hurting their feelings. Well, I'm bored. Let's go brush our teeth. Or, I've got to make a phone call. Hold this gum in your mouth.

Bad, Brush, Hurt, Phones, Should Have, Teeth

When you're at a comedy club, if you're not funny, you don't work. People will let you know, whether it's by booing or yelling for you to get out of the club. People are drunk or whatever and they'll let you have it.

Club, Comedy, Drunk, Let, People, Yelling

People don't realize, or maybe they've forgotten, that there was a time in history when standup comedy wasn't something that you had to hide your kids' ears from.

Comedy, Ears, Kids, Maybe, People

If God is a crutch, then atheism is a coma.

Atheism, Coma, Crutches, God

The truth is supposed to hurt. That's how it lets you know you don't got it.

Hurt, Truth, Truth Is, Supposed, Lets

Get out of our schools God, get out of our textbooks God, get out of our government God, go away God, go away God, go away God, Katrina hits, God, where are you?

God, Going Away, Government, School, Schools

When did banning anything, ever work? I mean, we banned liquor once in this country, oh, that worked like a charm, didn't it, folks? You couldn't find a drink in the roaring 20's, could ya? See that's the problem with the banning thing! I say why stop there, let's not ban guns, I know, let's ban crime!

Country, Crime, Gun, Know, Liquor, Mean

Conservative concepts believe in little government - take care of yourself, and that makes men who invent things like the constitution! Liberal thought has big government - we'll take care of you - and that creates boys and they create things like Occupy Wall Street! There's a difference between the way men and boys behave.

Believe, Constitution, Liberal, Like, Men, Wall

If we all die and there is no God, then it's just eternal unconsciousness, you'll never know, but if you're wrong. . . you'll know forever.

Die, Eternal, Forever, God, Know, There Is No God

I don't hate cats. . . as long as they stay on the freeway, where they belong.

Cat, Freeway, Hate, Long, Stay

I hope that nothing ever wussifies me to deny my own personal beliefs. Brainwashed wussies have been taught that standing up for yourself and defending your personal point of view makes you a close-minded hate monger. One must also be respectful of dissenting belief while supporting their own.

Brainwashed, Deny, Hate, Supporting, Taught, Views

If you can't say something nice. . . about an overrated, ungrateful European nation that would have been wiped off the face of the earth twice in the twentieth century if it weren't for the United States and which has given nothing to the culture in the past two hundred years but whine and cheese, both of which are made better in California, then don't say anything at all!

European, Nice, Past, Twice, Two, Whine

They got special terms that they use when they're pregnant. They don't even say pregnant, got special words they use - I'm expecting. Expecting what? I'm expecting a child, silly. Well, then, you probably got a good shot!

Children, Probably, Shot, Silly, Special, Terms

You're not a bunch of people lock-stepped with the politically correct. Oh no! Don't shoot the animals! They might get their feelings hurt!

Animal, Feelings, Hurt, People, Politically

You know what offends me? Offended people. In a country with guaranteed rights to freedom of religion, its citizens are constantly trying to make faith in public spheres illegal, I am offended by that contradiction and want to talk about it as a comic.

Country, Freedom, Offends, People, Rights, Spheres

Who is more irrational, the guy who believes in a God he can't see, or a guy who's offended by a God he doesn't believe in?

Believe, God, Guy, Irrational, See

Because when the Creator of matter, tell you you matter, then you have a purpose and then you have self-esteem.

Matter, Purpose, Self Esteem, Tell

››

Brad Stine Biography

Contact Us

About us