Top Sarah Silverman Quotes - Quotesmemo.com

Sarah Silverman Biography

Sarah Silverman

Sarah Kate Silverman (born December 1, 1970) is an American stand-up comedian, actress, producer, and writer. Her comedy addresses social taboos and controversial topics, such as racism, sexism, politics, and religion, sometimes having her comic character endorse them in a sarcastic or deadpan fashion. For her work on television, she has won two Primetime Emmy Awards.

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Sarah Silverman Quotes

I got jury duty and I didn't want to go, so my friend said, "You should write something really really racist on the form when you return it. Like, you should put 'I hate chinks'. " And I said, "I'm not going to put that on there just to get out of jury duty. I don't want people to think that about me. " So instead I wrote, "I love chinks. " And who doesn't?

Chinks, Funny, Hate, People, Writing

I think the difference between being miserable and finding happiness is just a matter of perspective. If you live your life defining yourself by what other people think of you, it's a form of self-torture.

Defining, Difference, Differences, Perspective, Self, Thinking

When I came out to L. A. , I got a part in an episode of 'Star Trek: Voyager,' and I hired an acting coach.

Acting, Episodes, Part, Stars, Trek, Voyager

Smells definitely do have a crazy impact on me.

Crazy, Impact, Smell, Definitely, Smells

I don't think there is a woman in her 40s who doesn't, kind of, examine herself in the mirror.

Thinking, Mirrors, Kind, Mirror, Woman

I mean, I talk about being Jewish a lot. It's funny because I do think of myself as Jewish ethnically, but I'm not religious at all. I have no religion.

Ethnically, Mean, Religious, Thinking

I'll tell you why we make fun of midgets: We're not afraid of them.

Afraid, Comedy, Fun, Funny, Humor, Make

I think when you're 25 you're still finding yourself, and you should have the freedom of that.

Finding, Finding Yourself, Freedom, Should Have, Think, Thinking

People who follow their religion to the letter of the law are just silly. I mean, I want to tell Hasidic Jews I promise you, God will not mind if you wear a nice cotton blend in the summer.

Mean, Mind, Nice, Silly, Summer

If you decide to do comedy that involves risk, risk means risk, and you can't complain of flesh wounds if you sit down at the table to play.

Decide, Flesh, Mean, Play, Risk

Traditionally, I have no right to talk about race. I'm white; I didn't grow up in an all-black neighborhood. But the license I see for myself is I'm a member of the world.

Growing Up, Member, Race, See, Traditionally, White

I never want to be in a position where I have to defend my material. It's too subjective. It's for other people to defend or not defend.

Defend, Materials, People, Position, Want

When you're a comic, it's like being born gay. It's what you want to do every night when your other friends are out at night going to parties.

Born, Gay, Like, Night, Party

If you sell the Vatican and you take that money and you use it to feed every single human being on the planet, you will get cah-azy pussy. All the pussy. I don't mean literally. That might not be your cup of tea. I don't know what your version of 'all the pussy' is. But you'll get all the pussy.

Mean, Pussy, Sell, Single, Tea, Vatican

As a kid, I was terrified. I was a bed wetter and I had to go to sleepaway camp every summer, which was humiliating and terrifying. I had lots of insecurities and scaredness. I covered it with being funny and tough, but it's hard to be tough when you're making your cot in your bunk over soaking wet sheets and acting like nobody can smell anything.

Kid, Kids, Nobody, Sleepaway, Smell, Summer

The first time I did stand-up was the summer I was 17.

Comedy, Firsts, Summer, Time

I was going to get an abortion the other day. I totally wanted an abortion. And it turns out I was just thirsty.

Abortion, Funny, Humor, Thirsty, Totally

When I was 17, I read a profile of Carol Leifer. Since then, I wanted to be her. I still want to be her.

Carols, Leifer, Profile, Read, Want

I remember the horror story that I told myself over and over again. I'm totally alone in my body. I'm totally alone in my head and nobody will ever see through my eyes. I'm just completely alone.

Body, Eye, Eyes, Horror Stories, Remember, Told

Jews, black people - any people who are hated or who have suffered, either as individuals or as a people - use humour. It is a survival skill.

Black, Hated, People, Skill, Skills

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