I've found in the past that the more closely I identify with the heroine, the less completely she emerges as a person. So from the first novel I've been learning techniques to distance myself from the characters so that they are not me and I don't try to protect them in ways that aren't good for the story.
I had to depend on Braille for my reading and guide for my walking. . . I am now wearing no glasses, reading and all without strain. . . by taking lessons in seeing. . . optometrists hate the method.