Individuals can spend their money more wisely, efficiently and more humanely than can government.
When I die I intend to take my music with me. I don't know what's out there, but I want to make sure it's in my key.
If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.
When they saw me walking down the street smoking a cigar, they'd say, 'Hey, that 14-year-old kid may be going places. ' Of course it's also a good prop on the stage. . . When you can't think of what you're supposed to say next, you can puff on your cigar until you think of your next line.
I'd rather be over the hill than under it.
A married couple that plays cards together is just a fight that hasn't started yet.
With the collapse of vaudeville new talent has no place to stink.
Sex sells, unless you're dehydrated in which case you'd be much more likely to purchase water.
I've always had the hair of Lionel Ritchie since I was a boy, but the mullet sadly is a hairpiece. My wife won't let me rock that hairstyle.
Anything of any importance cannot help but be unrecognizable, since it bears no resemblance to anything already known.
For as long as I care to remember, religion, like the striptease, has always been a display of the power of suggestion. Like the Virgin Birth, it has all too often supported an immaculate deception.