There's a bit of the kid in me.
I gave my wife a gift certificate for Christmas. She ran out to exchange it for a bigger size.
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
This man's wife told him, "For Christmas, surprise me. " On Christmas Eve he leaned over where she was sleeping and said, "Boo!"
A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, Are you comfortable? The man answers, I make a nice living.
For every studen with a spark of brilliance, there are about ten with ignition trouble.
When I was in school, one of my teachers was crazy about me. I once heard her tell another teacher, "I wish he was my kid for one day!"
In the middle ages, people took potions for their ailments. In the 19th century they took snake oil. Citizens of today's shiny, technological age are too modern for that. They take antioxidants and extract of cactus instead.
If you didn't auction the [CO2] permits, it would represent the largest corporate welfare program that has ever been enacted in the history of the United States. All of the evidence is that what would occur is that corporate profits would increase by approximately the value of the permits.
Art's primary social function is to define the communal self, which includes redefining it when the community is changing.
Ayame: "Yuki, let's deepen the bond between us brothers!" Yuki: "Before you can do that I'll drown you in the deepest part of that lake. " Ayame: "As long as we spend time together. " Yuki: "On second thought, go drown yourself.