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With every animal, you have to build its confidence around people because people do some crazy and stupid things

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Ian Shoales

I know what love is: Tracy and Hepburn, Bogart and Bacall, Romeo and Juliet, Jackie and John and Marilyn.

Bacall, Bogart, Jackie, John, Juliet, Love
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Football players, like prostitutes, are in the business of ruining their bodies for the pleasure of strangers.

Bodies, Football, Funny, Player, Prostitutes, Strangers

I don't like people who speak French in public places. This includes the French.

Like, People, Places, Speak, Speaks French

Why are we importing all these highbrow plays like `Amadeus'? I could have told you Mozart was a jerk for nothing.

Amadeus, Jerk, Mozart, Play, Told

Advice to rock gods: drugwise, stick to Ibuprofen, decaf lattes, and pale Pilsners. . . If your stomach is not a flat slab, please leave your shirt on while performing. . . If your girlfriend asks you to choose between her and your music, sell your instruments immediately - especially if you're a drummer. . . Finally, go easy on the supermodels, don't forget to tune, and remember: a tiny bit of dry ice and lasers goes a long way. Ditto with tattoos.

Girlfriend, Ice, Rock, Tattoo, Tune

The word relationship best refers to the connection between parasite and host, or shark and remora. It's a biological term. I'd rather be a jerk than a scientist when it comes to love.

Connections, Host, Love, Refers, Scientist, Sharks
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