The reality is that life, for all of us, is pretty stressful and we all need ways to cope.
My mother kept the house clean and we ate good. I didn't know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
Let's face it: It's difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
We get the worrywart, the hypochondriac, the money-grubbing miser, the intractable negotiator. . . Some would say certain of these refer to the stereotypical, or 'stage' Jew. But objectively speaking, the only crime in humor is an unfunny joke.
If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books.
A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat!
Well for the drones of the social hive that there are bees of an industrious turn, willing, for an infinitesimal share of the honey, to undertake the labor of its fabrication.
The Stars are a long way off, and their words get somewhat dulled in the message.
There is one-and only one-way to end the violence in Latin America. There is one-and only one-way to terminate the drug gangs. That way is by legalizing drugs. Legalizing drugs today would put an immediate end to the drug gangs and the drug-war violence.
I like talking; I like playing with the audience.