The advice "you never go broke taking a profit" is foolish.
I think my wife is cheating on me, the only thing the parrot knows how to say is, quick out the window.
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
We learned sexual technique from our dog. He taught how to beg, and he taught my wife how to roll over and play dead.
You know you're ugly when you go to the proctologist and he sticks his finger in your mouth.
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves.
It's not the events of our lives that shape us, but our beliefs as to what those events mean.
Aiya Earendil Elenion Ancalima!
We're still in this position where we haven't made a lot of decisions yet.
We have supported the banks, they should be supporting the economy now.