Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with it. - Daniel Tosh - Quotesmemo.com

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I didnt want to be 50 or 60 and auditioning for a three-line role.

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Daniel Tosh

Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with it.

Cheater, Cheaters, Funny Irish, Get Away, Prosper, Unless

Same Author Quotes

I think boxers are the greatest athletes in all sports for the simple fact that they don't cry. That is mind-blowing. Have you ever been punched in the nose? Oh my gosh, it hurts so bad. They have to go back to corner, where some little man yells at them. 'Shut up, I just got punched in the face!'. . . If I was a boxer, do you know who I would hire as my corner man? My mom.

Boxer, Gosh, Hurt, Know, Mom, Sports

You know who likes to get fisted? Sock puppets.

Likes, Puppets, Sock

How about we get rid of separate bathrooms for boys and girls? Gays and straights share the bathroom with zero issues. We need to put an end to the sexist pooping policies of yesterday. The only way to achieve gender equality is to start crapping in front of each other.

Bathroom, Bathrooms, Gay, Girl, Zero

I'm not saying I'm smarter than Steve Jobs was, but I would have made the iPhone charger cord twice as long.

Charger, Iphone, Jobs, Long

No one dies a virgin, Life screws us all

Dies, Life, Screws, Virgins

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Grant Heslov

Grant Heslov

I didnt want to be 50 or 60 and auditioning for a three-line role.

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Agesilaus II

If I have done any deed worthy of remembrance, that deed will be my monument. If not, no monument can preserve my memory.

Legacy, Memories, Memory, Monument, Remembrance

Erica Tazel

Erica Tazel

Because of old sports injuries, yoga has become a physical lifesaver. I also have an honest, loving, and caring circle of friends. A little bit of laughter and an occasional adult beverage never hurt nobody.

Beverage, Hurt, Injuries, Laughter, Lifesaver, Sports

Jean-Paul Sartre

Jean-Paul Sartre

It is not right, my fellow-countrymen, you who know very well all the crimes committed in our name. It's not at all right that you do not breathe a word about them to anyone, not even to your own soul, for fear of having to stand in judgment of yourself. I am willing to believe that at the beginning you did not realize what was happening; later, you doubted whether such things could be true; but now you know, and still you hold your tongues.

Believe, Judgment, Names, Soul, Word

Al Gore

Al Gore

We need to put a price on carbon, and that's what cap-and-trade does and that's also what a CO2 tax does. As long as our current valuation in the marketplace tells us every minute of every day that it's perfectly all right to dump 90 million tons of global warming into the thin atmosphere surrounding the planet every 24 hours as if that atmosphere is an open sewer, then the individual actions are not going to solve the problem.

Atmosphere, Current, Doe, Dump, Hours, Long