The comedy for the Democrats is that they're showing off too much. They need to be putting a … - Tina Fey

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I have advocated for rolling back regulations, simplifying the tax code and moving to zero-based budgeting - policies that will support small businesses and raise up the middle class.

Tina Fey

The comedy for the Democrats is that they're showing off too much. They need to be putting a boring white guy out there to kind of get a hold of things. Once the boring white guy is out there, then you bust out the junior senator from Illinois who smokes and does cocaine.

Boring, Cocaine, Comedy, Guy, Illinois, White

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Now every girl is expected to have: Caucasian blue eyes, full Spanish lips, a classic button nose, hairless Asian skin with a California tan, a Jamaican dance hall ass, long Swedish legs, small Japanese feet, the abs of a lesbian gym owner, the hips of a nine-year-old boy, the arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.

Achieving, Athlete, Eye, Girl, Gym, Look

If you ever start to feel good about yourself. . . . . . . they have this thing called the internet.

About Yourself, Feel Good, Internet, Start, Thing

And I can see Russia from my house.

House, Russia, Saturday Night Live, See

Why are my arms so weak? It's like I did that push-up last year for nothing!

Arms, Like, Rocks, Weak, Years

Whatever the problem, be part of the solution. Don’t just sit around raising questions and pointing out obstacles.

Careers, Obstacles, Problem, Questions, Solution, Witty