I was lucky enough to just play music as a living and not have a nine-to-five job. I didn't have to pay the bills so I was able to experiment.
It is a dogma of the Roman Church that the existence of God can be proved by natural reason. Now this dogma would make it impossible for me to be a Roman Catholic. If I thought of God as another being like myself, outside myself, only infinitely more powerful, then I would regard it as my duty to defy him.