I shouldn't tell jokes about my wife. she's attached to a machine that keeps her alive. . . The refrigerator.
Human beings are the only creatures who blush - or who need to.
Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
Life is short, Break the Rules. Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably And never regret ANYTHING That makes you smile.
Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
Worrying is paying interest on a debt you might not even owe.
I mean, you can't walk down the aisle in Westminster Abbey in a strapless dress, it just won't happen - it has to suit the grandeur of that aisle, it's enormous.
My father, his spirit is with me constantly, and I'm a believer in that world and the world of dreams. So I've had dreams of my father over the years, and that's the way I really stay connected to him. He's still in my subconscious. He lives in there.
I am not afraid that the people called Methodists should ever cease to exist either in Europe or America. But I am afraid lest they should only exist as a dead sect, having the form of religion without the power. And this undoubtedly will be the case unless they hold fast both the doctrine, spirit, and discipline with which they first set out.
Contentment is knowing you're right. Happiness is knowing someone else is wrong.