If you're gonna be a failure, at least be one at something you enjoy.
Mary Keitany from Kenya won the women's race at the New York City Marathon. You can tell she was fast because guys on the street didn't even have time to finish their catcalls.
Tourists - have some fun with New york's hard-boiled cabbies. When you get to your destination, say to your driver, "Pay? I was hitchhiking. "
George Clooney is on the program tonight. Next week at this time I will be in a hardware store watching them mix paint.
People say New Yorkers can't get along. Not true. I saw two New Yorkers, complete strangers, sharing a cab. One guy took the tires and the radio; the other guy took the engine.
I mean you think about the guy, the Nigerian guy, who was going to blow up the plane. He was wearing a pair of Fruit of the Lunatic. . . . Guy was not too bright. He said that the reason he became a suicide bomber was to work his way up in the al Qaeda organization.
There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.
If you make mistakes, if you act like a human being- I will love you no matter.
I have a genuine love affair with my audience. When I'm on stage they're not privileged to see me. It's a privilege for me to see them.
[My father] had spent his own short time like a priest in charge of a relic, forever expecting the blessed blood to liquefy.
It means basically I'm using the synthesizer more to change the sounds of other things rather than to use it as the source of the sound.