On the whole, life is unfair in the way it works out. It is a game played without an umpire!
Peace is the umpire for doing the will of God.
Any umpire who claims he has never missed a play is. . . well, an umpire.
It is the duty of the Umpire to determine all questions submitted to him according to these laws, when they apply, and according to his best judgment when they do not apply.
The umpire. . . is like the geyser in the bathroom; we cannot do without it, yet we notice it only when it is out of order.
In case of dispute, the umpire shall throw it straight into the field.
The job of arguing with the umpire belongs to the manager, because it won't hurt the team if he gets thrown out of the game.
Stay in school kids or you'll end up being an umpire.
I never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes.
Most plays that are missed by the umpire are caused by the umpire not reading those cues early enough and making the proper adjustments.
I didn't mean to hit the umpire with the dirt, but I did mean to hit that bastard in the stands.
Never wear a backward baseball cap to an interview unless applying for the job of umpire.
In a way an umpire is like a woman. He makes quick decisions, never reverses them, and doesn't think you're safe when you're out.
Being an umpire is like being a king. It prepares you for nothing.
Rules of society are nothing; one's conscience is the umpire.
Many baseball fans look upon an umpire as a sort of necessary evil to the luxury of baseball, like the odor that follows an automobile.
Ed (Runge), you're the second best umpire in the league. The other twenty-three are tied for first.
My favorite umpire is a dead one.
The roughest thing I ever said to an umpire was, 'Are you sure?'
Cardinal rule for all hitters with two strikes on them: Never trust the umpire.