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I think you need to be able to see a lot of negative in things in order to extract material, so there's probably something to that. A lot of the people I used to work with were very, very, very unfunny offstage, so that's a pretty common thing.

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Stephen Colbert

Attack life, it's going to kill you anyway.

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Can accidentally eating halal food make you Muslim? Yes, the same way drinking a cosmo can make you gay.

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If Corporations are people, I guarantee you that a government of those people, by those people, and for those people will continue to exist.

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You have a firm grasp of the obvious.

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Give a man a suicide bomb, he blows up once. Teach a man to suicide bomb, he also blows up once.

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