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And diff'ring judgments serve but to declare that truth lies somewhere, if we knew but where.

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Garrison Keillor

Never insult a writer. You may find yourself immortalized in ways you may not appreciate.

Appreciate, Finding Yourself, Immortalized, Insult, May, Writer
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I think if the church put in half the time on covetousness that it does on lust, this would be a better world for all of us.

Church, Half, Lust, Thinking, Time

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.

Christmas, Compulsory, Funny, Like, Love, Lovely

Intelligence is like four-wheel drive. It only allows you to get stuck in more remote places.

Drive, Four, Humor, Intelligent, Places, Remote

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.

Elephantine, Gentle, Greed, People, Time, Vanity

God writes a lot of comedy. . . the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.

Actors, Bad, Comedy, Encouraging, Funny, Life
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