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Comediennes are the lucky ones, because if you're funny, you can be 125 years old and they will still accept you.

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Gracie Allen

I left my car parked at the top of Lombard Street Hill, and I forgot to put the breaks on. It's the funniest thing. The car is running down the hill.

Car, Down, Hill, Hills, Left, Running
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Never place a period where God has placed a comma.

Funny, God, Humor, Motivation, Period, Placed

We favor putting Congress on a commission basis. Pay them for results. If they do a good job and the country prospers, they get 10% of the extra take.

Country, Favors, Job, Jobs, Prospers, Take

This recipe is certainly silly. It says to separate two eggs, but it doesn't say how far to separate them.

Eggs, Food, Recipe, Say, Separate, Silly

This used to be a government of checks and balances. Now it's all checks and no balances.

Balance, Balances, Checks, Government, Used

They laughed at Joan of Arc, but she went right ahead and built it.

Ahead, Arcs, Built, Joan, Laughed, Stupidity
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