Usually when Donald Trump wants to keep someone out of military service, he just fakes a doctor's note … - Stephen Colbert

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Quote of the day

All that exists, exists in some amount and can be measured.

Stephen Colbert

Usually when Donald Trump wants to keep someone out of military service, he just fakes a doctor's note saying he has a foot injury. It worked fine for him during Vietnam.

Donald, Fake, Injury, Keep, Military, Vietnam

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Can accidentally eating halal food make you Muslim? Yes, the same way drinking a cosmo can make you gay.

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If Corporations are people, I guarantee you that a government of those people, by those people, and for those people will continue to exist.

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You have a firm grasp of the obvious.

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I believe in pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps. I believe it is possible — I saw this guy do it once in Cirque du Soleil. It was magical.

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Give a man a suicide bomb, he blows up once. Teach a man to suicide bomb, he also blows up once.

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Tom Hiddleston

We pull on to the road, where our only company are the wandering cattle, who have become commonplace as traffic lights. Lethargic and listless, they look like they've been roaming the roads of Guinea since the dawn of time. And no doubt they will continue to long after we're gone.

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e. e. cummings

A pretty girl who is naked
is worth a million statues

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Become who you are by learning who you are.

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Sometimes we ask God for help and God gives us hope, not because it's different, but because it's the same.

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Edward Thorndike