I was referred to Mike Jones from the concierge at a Marriott hotel when I asked for a masseur. . . It was during the massage that it started to become sensual, and that led to him masturbating me.
Decaf is like masturbating with an oven mitt!
Remember what Anatole France said about the dog masturbating on your leg--'Sure, it's honest, but who needs it?
Breaking news is the most masturbating thing journalists do.
I can sell out Madison Square Garden masturbating
The closest I ever came to death was masturbating with a 104-degree temperature.
It's amazing what I could've written in my life if I had realized that I should keep writing and not masturbating.
Getting caught masturbating sucks. I got caught masturbating in jail 7 or 8 times, it really sucks.
Pornography is not in the hands of the child who discovers his sexuality by masturbating, but in the heart of the adult who slaps him.
Remember: People who live in glass houses can see you masturbating in their bushes.
The other day I walked in on my roommate while I was masturbating.
There's a fine line between masturbating while you look out a window, and masturbating while you're looking in a window. I'll give you a hint: one of 'em is super illegal.
